Dear Younger Me /or/ Life in the Time of Covid-19 (version2.0)

Dear Younger Me,

    

    NO. WAIT.  STOP!  DON’T THROW ME AWAY!

    NO BUTTERFLY EFFECT WILL BE TRIGGERED BY THE READING OF THIS!!!

    

    Whew...okay, you’re still here…
    

    Apologies for the shouting...I know how your mind works.  I promise I’ve run this through all the algorithms to make sure no part of it will adversely affect you or your family. Speaking of: Congrats!  You, super Mami, will make it through labor and delivery by the skin of your teeth...and let me tell you, it will be a rough ride but well worth it.  Henri is everything you are dreaming up right now, and more!  So set your mind at ease (ha!) and try to squeeze in a few more catnaps in the recliner before he decides to arrive.  Oh, and maybe stock up on post-partum recovery supplies on your next wander’bout the good old aisles of Tar-Jay.  (T.P., my friend...T.P.  Grab a truck load...you’re gonna need it!)  Now, how to word this so it doesn’t trip any alarms…

Be kind to yourself.
Give yourself grace to recover.
And become comfortable with the mute button.

    Anyhow...you know how right now as you read this you are worrying the heck out of yourself over Johannes?  Yeah?  Don’t!  Waste of time, young one...waste of time.  He’s going to surprise the heck out of you.  Without any spoilers (Sorry...didn’t pass inspection on any of them!) let’s just say he’s going to be the best big brother the world has ever seen. 

    So, obviously, we both know ‘something’s up’...or else I wouldn’t have risked writing to you like this. Here’s what I’m allowed to tell you:

    That virus in Asia?  It’s not staying there.  Change is coming, fast and hard.  Familiarize yourself with some new terminology now.  Go ahead and google:
    

PPE
Cytokine Storm

Distance Learning

Social-Distancing

    Whew...Mami...now, breathe.  I know, you’re hopped up on all those pregnancy hormones, but come back down to earth.  It’s really not that bad!  I mean, it is...bad…   But you don’t need to worry about it now.  What you need is a game plan.  Again, T.P.  Toilet Paper is the name of the game...trust me on this.  Just go ahead and stock up now.

    So before your crazy hormonal self spirals out of control and you think I’m writing to you from some post-Apocalyptic future where asymptomatic-carriers are mixing it up in violent protest, and Cheeto worshippers demonstrate Darwinian stereotypes, and the government hunkers into bunkers, and murder-hornets force us all indoors...take a breath (1...2...3...in...1...2...3...out) and rest assured, only 3 of those things are true.

 
    You know how everyone keeps talking to you like it’s your first go-round at motherhood, what with the “sleep before the baby comes” and “get your prep work in now”?  Err...yeah, they’re right.  Go Nike-style and Just.Do.It.  Sleepless nights are coming, and Henri’s only half to blame.   Remember that google spree you just went on?  PPE?  Get used to the sound of 3D printers running 24/7.  And prepare yourself to be prouder of Johannes then you’ve ever been before.  He’s going to surprise you. (Oh, crap...you caught that pluralization of the printer, didn’t you? Yeah, maybe start rearranging the kitchen now…”if you move it, they will come” and all.  Oh, and stock up on filament and plastic bags and print-bed tape now…you do NOT want to know how much I’m spending on shipping these days. Just go ahead and jump on Amazon quick and I’ll wait…

    Yeah, so, you fell asleep, huh?  What do you mean, “How do I know?”.  I’m you, idiot.  Future you, sitting here with my bank account screen open, hoping my words of wisdom got through to you in time to get my balance out of the red. Nevermind, I know you needed it...that whole pregnancy-insomnia thing…

    So where were we?  Right...PPE.  It’s going to consume every waking hour (and yeah, they’ll all be waking hours...Henri has reflux and since you can’t do a thing about it, it’s safe to tell you!) and basically take over the house.  Good news, though: PPE production will be Johannes’ saving grace.  Investing his skills and talents into this social-project will keep his anxiety at bay, and distract him from what you will come to learn is the de-educating of American youth known as “Distance Learning”.   You know that term “Busy Work”?  Let’s just say it’s in no way IEP-compliant, or tailored to the individual learner, or...frankly...of any educational use whatsoever.  That said, it serves a purpose: school compliancy with fulfilling 180 days no matter the how-what-where.  Prepare yourself though...it will drone on and on and on...pointless and predictable and much to the frustration of both you and Johannes...right up until today. 

    Distance-Learning is a blessing in disguise though.  You’ll both spend so much time staring at his computer screen, waiting for teacher updates and grading, that not being able to go anywhere ever won’t even leave a ripple.  Remember those shipping fees and our bank account?  Yeah...let’s just say online shopping is your Olympic sport!  I’m told it’s okay to let you know that Quarantine-Life is coming, bringing a halt to shopping for non-essentials and a massive slooooow down to shopping for groceries.  You know the gas lines at Costco?  Reimagine them as people-queues...but with 6 feet between each person and wrapping round the parking lot.  It will also shut down public spaces such as your local library (enjoy reading your current loans about 2 dozen times!), parks and recreation.  I’m here to let you know that Ergo Baby Carrier you’ve been eyeing up is totally worth the $$$...you WILL be walking up and down that side road A LOT!  Plus side:amazing convos with J-Bug while Henri lolls chest-side!

    All that staying home is a good thing, though.  You know how Johannes is?  Yeah...I know you know.  Well, social-distancing is his jam!  Just follow his lead!  He’s been avoiding peeps for years...he’ll show you how it’s done.  (And listen to him when he tells you to take your own advice.  All I can say is “the only opinions that matter come from people who matter to you” are the wisest words you’ve ever uttered and you are going to need to start practicing what you preach!)  Go ahead and let him “waste his time” on that Nightstrike mask if he wants to...it might just come in handy!

I know, I know...your eyes are starting to glaze over.  Hit that pedal and recline away...but put the blanket on your lap first..the cat’s claws haven’t been trimmed and we both know how much she enjoys napping right on that belly!  Yeowch!  I think by now Henri has grown quite adept at the in-utero kickoff!

    

    Naptime over so soon?  Okay, let’s dive back in...springtime is coming, and with it, social unrest.  Be prepared to hit the unfriend button...a lot...in the coming weeks as your clown-car of acquaintances begin to show their true colours.  The “Orange Orangutan” will prove once again that there is literally No Limit to his long-game con of the American public, his ability to stir things up, and his white supremacist leanings.  Just...be prepared.  It’s going to get nasty on all fronts, and you’ll find yourself divided between supporting the push for racial equality and supporting your friends in the first-response field. Thankfully, Henri will start rolling over and pre-crawling right when it hits fever-pitch, so you’ll be too distracted keeping him alive to fall into the pits of despair. 

    Listen, you’ve got this.  The family motto isn’t “Roll with the Punches” for nothing, after all.  It’s going to be a rough season for sure, but you’ll make it to today at least!  And hey, all that Social-Distancing will serve as a great excuse for avoiding those who are generally too close for comfort...You KNOW who we mean! 

    So stay safe...stay healthy...and when they say “push”...dig in like your life depends on it...

    

    It Will!

 
                ~You, Me, and She

P.s- Feel free to pack away all your “nice” clothes.  You won’t be wearing any of them anytime soon.  Oh, and pants!  No need for them either.

P.p.s- Do Not Under Any Circumstances pack away your makeup.  Zoom is coming...and hi-def is not your post-partum friend!

Dear Younger Me /or/ Life in the Time of Covid-19 (version1.0)

Another long abandonment comes to a close.

Despite the silence, the space still exists here, just waiting to be filled up with all the words.

To that end, enjoy this little offering "in two parts"...the first: written by my longtime-editor/cause-of-caffeine-dependency/firstborn son, as his final assignment for the school-year.  The second to follow in another post: my first attempt at filling a page in months.
~~~

Dear Younger Me,

    

    No, not the song title. ‘Tis I, your future self! *Pen flourish*  Worry not, I’ve no intention of altering the timeline. I’m just here to prepare you a bit, for what’s to come.

    By now, you’re probably aware of that somewhat mysterious virus in Asia, and are mildly concerned about it, though thankful that you are safe at home on American soil. Unfortunately, that doesn’t mean quite what you think. In fact, quick tangent here: you might want to stock up on some at-home basics right about now, such as toilet paper and sanitizer. The virus, COVID-19, will eventually go on a world-tour, spreading its pestilence far and wide. The first real casualty here in the United States will be the existing public health system, as hospitals scramble to provide care for a massive uptick in patients. Worldwide demand on the necessary hospital equipment will be shockingly higher than the supply, resulting in many countries instituting lockdowns and quarantines in an effort to slow the spread. 

    Is your anxiety beginning to peak, yet?  Worry not!  I’m here to tell you that this season of your life will be the one in which you rise to the occasion! You’ll suddenly find yourself up ‘til all hours, printing and packaging PPE to donate to all the front-line workers and first-responders, because the official supplies keep getting seized by the government for their private stash. While the general public will be doing its best to “flatten the curve” by engaging in something you’ll come to know as Social-Distancing, the Head Cheeto in Charge ©️ Nightstrike’s Customs will be holding hospital supplies hostage. You, though, and other socially-minded young people will step up and find ways to produce the very items hospitals need most. Ingenuity and creativity, as well as 3-D printers will win the day! Speaking of, quick tangent alert again: maybe stock up on filament now?!? You do not want to see the shipping costs I am dealing with, young engineer!

    Speaking of rising to the occasion: You’ll have to learn how to juggle prototyping, PPE-delivery, a mysterious time-depleter known only as “Distance Learning,” and helping out with your new baby brother Henri. Good luck! You’re going to need it! Good thing you’ve always been a pursuer of higher knowledge, buddy. By the time we meet, you’ll have earned you professorship!

    You, my friend, will end up looking back on the days you were trapped in the school building, and realize that the old adage is true: you never know how good it is until it’s gone.  Back then,you were at least learning something new every day. Let’s just say “Busy Work” will be the new curriculum. Teachers will scramble to find ways to keep students engaged, without the benefit of in-person learning. It won’t work out well. Your schoolwork will continue, and Watchung Hills will be that one school that does not accommodate those who lack in some area, be it a quiet space to work, or simply a lack of a computer to use. But you will make it through, and you will be able to relax, at least a little.

    Some three months in or so, people will think that everything’s going back to normal, but you know that won’t be the case. Society at large will be “tired” of having had to adjust their typical lifestyles and the first stirrings of unrest will be explosive. Racism will have a major influx the likes of which you’ll have only read about in History books. You’ll see playing out in real-time, the concept of survival of the fittest as various bigot groups forgo safety precautions to willfully spread their hate.

    Friends will be made, friends will be lost, and the effects of, well . . . 2020, in general, will continue, as tensions rise, and you start to fear that you’ll be silenced by the new policies put in place. Brutality and violence will increase exponentially, and, at the time I write this, it may even end up reaching Somerset County. But things will change. Maybe not for a while, but hopefully for the better.

    Don’t stress over your mistakes, but recognize that you now can do better.

    

    Don’t worry about things possibly getting worse.

    It’s out of your control!!!

    What IS in your control, is your life. Make the best of it, and don’t worry about the negative in the world, or you’ll find yourself worrying for the rest of your life. 

                            Stay safe, and healthy,
                                J. W.

    P.S. Don’t worry about the cat, either! She’ll eventually come around to liking Henri.

    P.P.S. Maybe ask your mother if you can take a turn on the stock market and dump some extra change into a little thing called Zoom.